I'm addicted to this guy: Paulo Coelho
I've read most of his books and yes....I hate to admit this but I cried each time I read his books. Dang...so much for being a wuss...too emotional seh!
But seriously, he writes good stuff. I read "A thousand splendid suns" by khaleed hosseini.....I cried EVEN MORE!
I'm one who couldn't bear seeing people's suffering especially, the weak and the disabled. Anything that concern children,women,elderly people...I'll cry...
The power of words...
Paulo Coelho writes good stuff and what better way to start things off other than reading his book, the ever famous book, "The Alchemist." There are certai complexity in certain chapters but if you read on, you'll be amazed! His short stories are the best especially his short story book entitled "Like the flowing river", truly inspiring!
“Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering.”
"I think that perhaps we always fall in love the very first time we see the man of our dreams, even though, at the time, reason may be telling otherwise, and we may fight against that instinct, hoping against hope that we won't win, until there comes a point when we allow ourselves to be vanquished by our feelings...”
”Love is looking at the same mountains from different angles.”
“Every day, God gives us, as well as the sun, a moment when it is possible to change anything that is causing us unhappiness. The magic moment is the moment when a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ can change our whole existence. Every day, we try to pretend that we do not see that moment, this it does not exit, that today is the same as yesterday and that tomorrow will be the same too. However, anyone who pays close attention to his day will discover the magic moment. It might be hidden in the instant that we put the key in the door in the morning, in the moment of silence after supper, in the thousand and one things that appear to us to be the same. This moment exists, a moment in which all the strenght of the stars flows through us and allows us to perform miracles.” Coelho By the River Piedra I sat down and wept
There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.
There is one great truth on this planet: whoever you are, or whatever it is that you do, when you really want something, it's because that desire originated in the soul of the universe. It's your mission on earth.
"...for her, every day was the same, and when each day is the same as the next, it's because people fail to recognize the good things that happen in their lives every day that the sun rises."
Every man has a feminine side, and every woman a masculine side. It is important to use discipline with intuition, and to use intuition with objectivity.
Ecod (it's been a long time since I last said this,LOL!)
Monday, April 28, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Exhausted
It's a tormentous period for me..ish...really that bad?Erm I guess so!
Seriously, I don't even know where I'm heading to right now. My mind is so fixated on the idea that I'm leaving the company. I have no mood to do the things which I've always loved doing. I used to be very "semangat" (passionate) about my work and I've been dubbed a workoholic.I was at the pinnacle, top of the world and I love my job.
There are times when "my system" were tested but knowing me, I took it as part and parcel of life. The truth is, I guess I'm naive at times (or most of the times)
It comes to the point where others took advantage of me (work wise!), I was just too nice to almost everyone and it's hard for me to say "NO!"
But soon I realised, I cared so much for others but do they care about what I do, my feelings? It's an ugly world, a dog-eat-dog world and reality check, it stays this way whether I like it or not.
Ooo...digress a bit ah!
Finally, I've just installed the new flashplayer and I get to surf my soccernet webpage with ease......
I don't subscribe to the sports channel because mum said it's a waste of money (eyes rolling) so to get my updates,I log on to soccernet.com to get the updates and they do update you on the scoreline as the match is being played. Besides, it keeps me updated of who's who, who's being sold, who's being knocked out. Otherwise, atuk will update me on the matches or scorelines and he normally exaggerates when it comes to Manchester United matches (devils fan mah!)
Ok, where was I?
Yes, it's a dog eat dog world out there, the survival of the fittest! I no longer see the spark, the light is getting dimmer, there's no beacon of light paving its way for me to improve. I have the chance to but too many things seems to be holding me back. I'm just not happy anymore. I need to seek my own happiness, it needs to be pursued.
Besides facing personal problems within the family, other reasons for me leaving the company is because: I'm not happy. I'm angry say half the time but I become a different person once I see my children coming to class. The hugs, cuddles and kisses brightens up my day no matter how crazy they can be at times. As I learn to know more about my children, they are also learning more about me.
My colleagues used to tell me that, "Oh Ezan, one of the craziest and funniest (not to mention lame as well!) teacher we have in school." Now that they have stop calling me that because I'm quitting, the children are calling me that. Bella kept telling her mates that "Oh, Ms Ezan you're so funny. You're just so funny. You always make me laugh and you make everyone laugh!"
Now, what does that indicate? Yes....my children are happy with me. They are happy with what I do in school and they are absolutely grateful and content. Yes, some may grudge whenever I gave them the "don't mess with me look" but at the end of the day, they'll come and embrace, thanking me for the day in school. Once they're gone, I'm a sad goon once again.
Once I leave the school, I'm a happy person once again because I get to meet Fazli. We have been meeting everyday for the past 2 weeks and yes, some of my colleagues have expressed their concern. The thing is, we just spent a good one hour or two with one another since we are staying quite close to one another. Well, say what you want to say, we're doing nothing wrong. We do have our separate moments whereby he'll be at home taking care of his dad and I'll be doing my own things such as going jogging, hitting around, solitary shopping (ceh ceh!).
So, we do give space to one another.
But lately, I've been complaining to him that I feel that I'm getting too lazy He told me I'm overworked and I'm super exhausted. Maybe I am...I'm not sure. Speaking of which, I have yet to update my lesson plan and my unit of enquiry. Arrrggghhh...I'm feeling grouchy. I'm so sick and tired of everything!
Seriously, I don't even know where I'm heading to right now. My mind is so fixated on the idea that I'm leaving the company. I have no mood to do the things which I've always loved doing. I used to be very "semangat" (passionate) about my work and I've been dubbed a workoholic.I was at the pinnacle, top of the world and I love my job.
There are times when "my system" were tested but knowing me, I took it as part and parcel of life. The truth is, I guess I'm naive at times (or most of the times)
It comes to the point where others took advantage of me (work wise!), I was just too nice to almost everyone and it's hard for me to say "NO!"
But soon I realised, I cared so much for others but do they care about what I do, my feelings? It's an ugly world, a dog-eat-dog world and reality check, it stays this way whether I like it or not.
Ooo...digress a bit ah!
Finally, I've just installed the new flashplayer and I get to surf my soccernet webpage with ease......
I don't subscribe to the sports channel because mum said it's a waste of money (eyes rolling) so to get my updates,I log on to soccernet.com to get the updates and they do update you on the scoreline as the match is being played. Besides, it keeps me updated of who's who, who's being sold, who's being knocked out. Otherwise, atuk will update me on the matches or scorelines and he normally exaggerates when it comes to Manchester United matches (devils fan mah!)
Ok, where was I?
Yes, it's a dog eat dog world out there, the survival of the fittest! I no longer see the spark, the light is getting dimmer, there's no beacon of light paving its way for me to improve. I have the chance to but too many things seems to be holding me back. I'm just not happy anymore. I need to seek my own happiness, it needs to be pursued.
Besides facing personal problems within the family, other reasons for me leaving the company is because: I'm not happy. I'm angry say half the time but I become a different person once I see my children coming to class. The hugs, cuddles and kisses brightens up my day no matter how crazy they can be at times. As I learn to know more about my children, they are also learning more about me.
My colleagues used to tell me that, "Oh Ezan, one of the craziest and funniest (not to mention lame as well!) teacher we have in school." Now that they have stop calling me that because I'm quitting, the children are calling me that. Bella kept telling her mates that "Oh, Ms Ezan you're so funny. You're just so funny. You always make me laugh and you make everyone laugh!"
Now, what does that indicate? Yes....my children are happy with me. They are happy with what I do in school and they are absolutely grateful and content. Yes, some may grudge whenever I gave them the "don't mess with me look" but at the end of the day, they'll come and embrace, thanking me for the day in school. Once they're gone, I'm a sad goon once again.
Once I leave the school, I'm a happy person once again because I get to meet Fazli. We have been meeting everyday for the past 2 weeks and yes, some of my colleagues have expressed their concern. The thing is, we just spent a good one hour or two with one another since we are staying quite close to one another. Well, say what you want to say, we're doing nothing wrong. We do have our separate moments whereby he'll be at home taking care of his dad and I'll be doing my own things such as going jogging, hitting around, solitary shopping (ceh ceh!).
So, we do give space to one another.
But lately, I've been complaining to him that I feel that I'm getting too lazy He told me I'm overworked and I'm super exhausted. Maybe I am...I'm not sure. Speaking of which, I have yet to update my lesson plan and my unit of enquiry. Arrrggghhh...I'm feeling grouchy. I'm so sick and tired of everything!
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Your arse is in my hands
Yes........FINALLY....I WON!
One must be thinking, what the heck is she talking about.
Sorry,I was just being random! (indirectly pin-pointing it towards Fazli!)
I thought I had fits (laughing fits) to be exact. Sorry Faz, you had to be my punching bag, oh well you asked for it. This bugger of mine can't seem to keep his hands in his pockets. I was attacked left, right,center, back....wah piang eh..."boleh naik sawan"
I couldn't sleep on Thursday because of him...hmph........
Friday was worst but I did not surrender. I had to stoop to conquer and yes...it worked!
After fetching me from work, we decided to have early-dinner. He was not really full
The saga did not end there. It was worst in the bus with all the ah-peks, uncles and pakcik2 staring at me as I squirm and wriggle my way out from his arms. Thank God, by the time we were at the library, he paused his nonsense because we were in the children's section. He was acting so grouchy because of the virus thus I took this chance to spent some quality time alone at the far end of the corner as I search for my children's books.
Once done, the saga continues. I'm telling you, never mess with a PTI "physical training instructor" or an ex-PTI for that matter, you never know the things he could do to you in public. I've had my fair share of embarrasing moments and I believed there's more to come (masyallah...help me!)
It came to the point where he tested my patience and that's it, I've had it. I just gave him the cold shoulder. But hearing his voice and looking at his sad,looking puppy eyes, I couldn't bear to give him the cold treatment throughout, thus I gave him another chance. Going back was nice because he had to rush home to get to JB (alhamdulillah,SAVED!)
But, I was wrong. We decided to take the train and there were loads of "baiya(s) in the train and he went on with his antics (masyallah!). I kept cool and entertain him until "next stop: Choa Chu Kang!"
The minute he got up, my hand slapped his arse......REAL HARD but I did not think it was hard enough. Woah.....you should have seen sayang's face...bright red....LOL
I couldn't stop laughing my arse off and the baiyas were eyeing us like vultures, wondering what the heck is going on. A Chinese couple was staring at us and they were giggling. Sayang just froze and he was swearing under his breath (Hahahaha!)
5 minutes later,
SMS message
Fazli: You wait...you just wait!
Ezan: Hehehe...nice arse!
Fazli: YOU JUST WAIT!
Guess what....I slept soundly like a baby. As for him, he slept at 5am...hehehehe!
I just got paid...half-pay and I spent 60 bucks liao...goodness...impulse buying...no!
I did not get to buy my stuff,it's been a while since I went shopping. Previous paychecks went mostly to Mum,my brother,my transportation,children's stuff, Grandad....so I had little for myself.
This time, I decided to reward myself a little....bought a sport bra,jersey and body shop stuff! No more buys because it's back to bills!!
*baiyas - Bangla
One must be thinking, what the heck is she talking about.
Sorry,I was just being random! (indirectly pin-pointing it towards Fazli!)
I thought I had fits (laughing fits) to be exact. Sorry Faz, you had to be my punching bag, oh well you asked for it. This bugger of mine can't seem to keep his hands in his pockets. I was attacked left, right,center, back....wah piang eh..."boleh naik sawan
I couldn't sleep on Thursday because of him...hmph........
Friday was worst but I did not surrender. I had to stoop to conquer and yes...it worked!
After fetching me from work, we decided to have early-dinner. He was not really full
The saga did not end there. It was worst in the bus with all the ah-peks, uncles and pakcik2 staring at me as I squirm and wriggle my way out from his arms. Thank God, by the time we were at the library, he paused his nonsense because we were in the children's section. He was acting so grouchy because of the virus thus I took this chance to spent some quality time alone at the far end of the corner as I search for my children's books.
Once done, the saga continues. I'm telling you, never mess with a PTI "physical training instructor" or an ex-PTI for that matter, you never know the things he could do to you in public. I've had my fair share of embarrasing moments and I believed there's more to come (masyallah...help me!)
It came to the point where he tested my patience and that's it, I've had it. I just gave him the cold shoulder. But hearing his voice and looking at his sad,looking puppy eyes, I couldn't bear to give him the cold treatment throughout, thus I gave him another chance. Going back was nice because he had to rush home to get to JB (alhamdulillah,SAVED!)
But, I was wrong. We decided to take the train and there were loads of "baiya(s) in the train and he went on with his antics (masyallah!). I kept cool and entertain him until "next stop: Choa Chu Kang!"
The minute he got up,
I couldn't stop laughing my arse off and the baiyas were eyeing us like vultures, wondering what the heck is going on. A Chinese couple was staring at us and they were giggling. Sayang just froze and he was swearing under his breath (Hahahaha!)
5 minutes later,
SMS message
Fazli: You wait...you just wait!
Ezan: Hehehe...nice arse!
Fazli: YOU JUST WAIT!
Guess what....I slept soundly like a baby. As for him, he slept at 5am...hehehehe!
I just got paid...half-pay and I spent 60 bucks liao...goodness...impulse buying...no!
I did not get to buy my stuff,it's been a while since I went shopping. Previous paychecks went mostly to Mum,my brother,my transportation,children's stuff, Grandad....so I had little for myself.
This time, I decided to reward myself a little....bought a sport bra,jersey and body shop stuff! No more buys because it's back to bills!!
*baiyas - Bangla
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Sweet liberty
6.5 weeks and counting...sweet,sweet liberation
I'm counting down...
Anyway, I'm feeling restless and listless for the past few days. I need a "renaissance period" (like say what?)
Work's great...erm..not really, just OK-LAH!
How do I make you happy?
The thing about being with someone, sometimes you just have to ask yourself, am I doing enough, am I doing the right thing?
Mind you, these questions never existed until you know lah hah!
Alright, what's there to be afraid. Everyone knows I'm with him so yes, I'm referring to my boyfriend Fazli. He's a nice chap,he truly cares about my feelings, passionate about lots of things,responsible, sweet and he has got good rapport with people he's in contact with.
Sometimes, I wonder whether the situation is too overwhelming for him, say in situation where he meets nearly half of my family members (like both from mum and dad's side, yikes!) I'll freak out if I was in his shoes but I have the upmost respect for him because he opens up easily and he'll just go with the flow. I can sense he's nervous about it but he doesn't show it. He fits in easily and thus, "I love you for that!"
I do not want to force him into doing things because I'm afraid it gets too much for him but he said, he's "OK" with everything...hmmm.....he's sincere about it so alhamdulillah!
Anyway, we've been meeting quite often, with him fetching me from work and tution.We're happy, always happy, always smiling (this doesn't stops, it comes to the point where I feel that I've gone senile or something when I caught myself smiling,LOL!) but I can sense that something's amiss. I just couldn't figure out what it is!
One thing that I wish my dear Fazli could work out on, is his familial ties with his family.
Fazli knows how much I complained about my family at times.
He's aware that my mum is not someone to be messed with and he often listens to my complaints and rants about how she wants things her way and yadaaa...yadaaa...yadaaaa... but he's always there to support me, always ready to give me advice, I truly appreciate that.
BUT,
What about you sayang?I want you to be happy too...with your family. I feel bad at times and I did tell him this (like whenever he spent his time with me and not with his family. I told him that there should be a two-way traffic) and I apologize too! I truly appreciate his time (seriously....) for me but I want you to be happy. I know that you're happy whenever you are with me but I hope you could build the same rapport you had with me and my family together with yours. I would love to help but knowing me, the ever so "slow and slenger" Ezan, I tend to be blur in things like this because I never thought that my ideas is good enough. Ah...that's my weakness...low self-confidence!
With Fazli around, hmm...alhamdulillah, I did manage to pick myself up and stop being some "kunniang chic." I may not appear so but ooops...I do admit, there are times when I can be that "kunniang" and it just bugs the "sh**" out of me and even sayang for that matter.
Not many remembers Ezan as the affectionate homosapien on Earth (well except towards my little darlings in school, you know how much I love my "little darlings" in school) but yes....by nature I am. Faz has no qualms of being very affectionate towards me,er....as for me, I can be a little reserved at times. But for this...........I just have to say it (in case you're reading it dear)
I love you Fazli, whole-heartedly.......
(OK Ruthie, you will laugh your hearts out when you read this or anyone for that matter BUT, YES....I love this guy.....very much!)
Anyway, you did not sound good on the phone just now. I know I may not be the most wise person on earth or decision-maker for that matter and it pisses you off kan kan kan, cos it pisses me off too. I'm trying my best. It's just that, I do not want to have nitty-gritty stuff to get into our way and that leads to silence......so sayang, so sorry about er.....I don't know what I've done but I just wanted to say sorry.
By the way, you had your "fun" today (hmmph...not fair ah!), my turn will come soon.
"Hari ini hari you,takper..takper...hari esok...it's mine so you better watch your arse.....LOL"
I'm counting down...
Anyway, I'm feeling restless and listless for the past few days. I need a "renaissance period" (like say what?)
Work's great...erm..not really, just OK-LAH!
How do I make you happy?
The thing about being with someone, sometimes you just have to ask yourself, am I doing enough, am I doing the right thing?
Mind you, these questions never existed until you know lah hah!
Alright, what's there to be afraid. Everyone knows I'm with him so yes, I'm referring to my boyfriend Fazli. He's a nice chap,he truly cares about my feelings, passionate about lots of things,responsible, sweet and he has got good rapport with people he's in contact with.
Sometimes, I wonder whether the situation is too overwhelming for him, say in situation where he meets nearly half of my family members (like both from mum and dad's side, yikes!) I'll freak out if I was in his shoes but I have the upmost respect for him because he opens up easily and he'll just go with the flow. I can sense he's nervous about it but he doesn't show it. He fits in easily and thus, "I love you for that!"
I do not want to force him into doing things because I'm afraid it gets too much for him but he said, he's "OK" with everything...hmmm.....he's sincere about it so alhamdulillah
Anyway, we've been meeting quite often, with him fetching me from work and tution.We're happy, always happy, always smiling (this doesn't stops, it comes to the point where I feel that I've gone senile or something when I caught myself smiling,LOL!) but I can sense that something's amiss. I just couldn't figure out what it is!
One thing that I wish my dear Fazli could work out on, is his familial ties with his family.
Fazli knows how much I complained about my family at times.
He's aware that my mum is not someone to be messed with and he often listens to my complaints and rants about how she wants things her way and yadaaa...yadaaa...yadaaaa... but he's always there to support me, always ready to give me advice, I truly appreciate that.
BUT,
What about you sayang?I want you to be happy too...with your family. I feel bad at times and I did tell him this (like whenever he spent his time with me and not with his family. I told him that there should be a two-way traffic) and I apologize too! I truly appreciate his time (seriously....) for me but I want you to be happy. I know that you're happy whenever you are with me but I hope you could build the same rapport you had with me and my family together with yours. I would love to help but knowing me, the ever so "slow and slenger" Ezan, I tend to be blur in things like this because I never thought that my ideas is good enough. Ah...that's my weakness...low self-confidence!
With Fazli around, hmm...alhamdulillah, I did manage to pick myself up and stop being some "kunniang chic." I may not appear so but ooops...I do admit, there are times when I can be that "kunniang" and it just bugs the "sh**" out of me and even sayang for that matter.
Not many remembers Ezan as the affectionate homosapien on Earth (well except towards my little darlings in school, you know how much I love my "little darlings" in school) but yes....by nature I am. Faz has no qualms of being very affectionate towards me,er....as for me, I can be a little reserved at times. But for this...........I just have to say it (in case you're reading it dear)
I love you Fazli, whole-heartedly.......
(OK Ruthie, you will laugh your hearts out when you read this or anyone for that matter BUT, YES....I love this guy.....very much!)
Anyway, you did not sound good on the phone just now. I know I may not be the most wise person on earth or decision-maker for that matter and it pisses you off kan kan kan, cos it pisses me off too. I'm trying my best. It's just that, I do not want to have nitty-gritty stuff to get into our way and that leads to silence......so sayang, so sorry about er.....I don't know what I've done but I just wanted to say sorry.
By the way, you had your "fun" today (hmmph...not fair ah!), my turn will come soon.
"Hari ini hari you,takper..takper...hari esok...it's mine so you better watch your arse.....LOL"
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Drive
I had a great day with brown-eyed cutie today although it was short. It's all my fault!
I told him I could settle all my chores by Asar prayers but I did not. We eventually settled everything by 5.15pm. He was early though and I was still in the shower. What to do, I had to complete all the chores by myself...3 sets of laundry...woah.....not to mention all the sweeping and mopping. I woke up late,dang.....
Syg arrived at 4.35pm, sitting and waiting patiently outside. Kiki was being such a nuisance to me, he did not want to open the door (claimed he was tired, bugger!) so I had to wrap myself like some old grandmother and pass him the car key.
We had to run some errands too. So sorry for wasting too much time....
But thankfully, he did not mind. At least, we went to interesting places which I have never been before. It was the best day of my life. Watching him drive, singing his heart out to some jiwang music (hai...too much influence from Baba!), seeing him acting all grouchy like some "makcik" just makes my heart go "hai..........." (weird..hahaha!) I guess I love him too much!
I guess this is the first time I've ever felt such strong feelings for someone. At first, I thought it was just mere infatuation but as time goes by, we learnt to accept our flaws and it is through such flaws that makes love grow fonder...hehehe
I love Jurong Hill. Changi Coast Rd simply reminds me of a scene from "Mukhsin". It was so nice and perfect, quiet, calm and ehem2 romantic. We wish we could stay there long but there were police on patrol, so we had to make a move. Yishun dam was another chillout place,perfect for BBQ: a nice treat for the family. The ambience was great!
We did not eat much though because he was too full and I felt bloated because of my menstrual cramps. We had roti john and baby kailan...yum yum. Syg said it's a very bad combination but ehem ehem...who went to eat up my kailan,tehehe...kidding2.
Jurong Hill - "Epitome of sweet yayness"
Cool ambience, fresh air, cool, breezy air and 20 minutes of pure giggles, tickles and punches. Hahaha......
Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love
Listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
i love peaceful melody
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved
So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours
I love you...till our next road trip to nowhere (can't wait!)
I told him I could settle all my chores by Asar prayers but I did not. We eventually settled everything by 5.15pm. He was early though and I was still in the shower. What to do, I had to complete all the chores by myself...3 sets of laundry...woah.....not to mention all the sweeping and mopping. I woke up late,dang.....
Syg arrived at 4.35pm, sitting and waiting patiently outside. Kiki was being such a nuisance to me, he did not want to open the door (claimed he was tired, bugger!) so I had to wrap myself like some old grandmother and pass him the car key.
We had to run some errands too. So sorry for wasting too much time....
But thankfully, he did not mind. At least, we went to interesting places which I have never been before. It was the best day of my life. Watching him drive, singing his heart out to some jiwang music (hai...too much influence from Baba!), seeing him acting all grouchy like some "makcik" just makes my heart go "hai..........." (weird..hahaha!) I guess I love him too much!
I guess this is the first time I've ever felt such strong feelings for someone. At first, I thought it was just mere infatuation but as time goes by, we learnt to accept our flaws and it is through such flaws that makes love grow fonder...hehehe
I love Jurong Hill. Changi Coast Rd simply reminds me of a scene from "Mukhsin". It was so nice and perfect, quiet, calm and ehem2 romantic. We wish we could stay there long but there were police on patrol, so we had to make a move. Yishun dam was another chillout place,perfect for BBQ: a nice treat for the family. The ambience was great!
We did not eat much though because he was too full and I felt bloated because of my menstrual cramps. We had roti john and baby kailan...yum yum. Syg said it's a very bad combination but ehem ehem...who went to eat up my kailan,tehehe...kidding2.
Jurong Hill - "Epitome of sweet yayness"
Cool ambience, fresh air, cool, breezy air and 20 minutes of pure giggles, tickles and punches. Hahaha......
Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love
Listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
i love peaceful melody
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love loved
So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours
I love you...till our next road trip to nowhere (can't wait!)
Friday, April 18, 2008
Glory days over...mine's not!
"Glory glory Man-United"
10,000 decibels(did I get that right?) affected, ruined,gone..........
As much as I hate to hear those words and cheers from my arch rivals, nothing can be done, I guess they're going to clinch the title.
Arsenal have had their worst 12 weeks of boo-boo(s) this season. After losing to the devils 2-1, they can bid final goodbye(s) to both the Premier and Champions League. They claimed they were not inferior to any teams..oh bother!
A win against Reading will at least boost the confidence and self-esteem of any breathing gunner out there...I suppose (we're all hibernating now!)
I'm having cramps....hate it!
I'm doing my household chores....ALONE
nEWS FLASH: Kiki's going to serve this nation of ours officially on 6th June 08, sorry couldn't be there for you bro....make sure you have plenty of dry laundry (teheee!)
It's a melancholic gay feeling that I had (fancy coming up with such thoughtless expression...am I?)
I'm going to miss this bugger of mine but oh well, at least I have another "bugger" with me (kidding2 syg!)
Back to chores...
Can't wait to see you later "brown-eyed cutie", we have the car.....teeheeee!
10,000 decibels(did I get that right?) affected, ruined,gone..........
As much as I hate to hear those words and cheers from my arch rivals, nothing can be done, I guess they're going to clinch the title.
Arsenal have had their worst 12 weeks of boo-boo(s) this season. After losing to the devils 2-1, they can bid final goodbye(s) to both the Premier and Champions League. They claimed they were not inferior to any teams..oh bother!
A win against Reading will at least boost the confidence and self-esteem of any breathing gunner out there...I suppose (we're all hibernating now!)
I'm having cramps....hate it!
I'm doing my household chores....ALONE
nEWS FLASH: Kiki's going to serve this nation of ours officially on 6th June 08, sorry couldn't be there for you bro....make sure you have plenty of dry laundry (teheee!)
It's a melancholic gay feeling that I had (fancy coming up with such thoughtless expression...am I?)
I'm going to miss this bugger of mine but oh well, at least I have another "bugger" with me (kidding2 syg!)
Back to chores...
Can't wait to see you later "brown-eyed cutie", we have the car.....teeheeee!
Monday, April 14, 2008
Listless, my poor gunners
I've been feeling rather listless these days.....
Suddenly, I feel so-like-Baba!
I normally sleep late but lately, I have been sleeping at 9pm and waking up at 11pm or 12am feeling groggy and agitated. Work's not done, bag's not packed,shucks......
Anyway,I'm counting down, 8 weeks left and I'm looking forward to the day where I'll be able to walk away free without having any guilty conscience and my heads up high, telling myself that,"I have indeed made the right decision."
Anyway, each time I'm moving to something new, there's always a couple of other setbacks that comes along the way. Not many of them turns out ugly, this is just one of the rare occassion that keeps me on my toes and it "pinches" me. (why do I care so much, do they care...no right...so?)
Anyway,as I was saying, there is a newbie at my workplace,she's super cool. She's 27 but she doesn't look 27,very spunky,bubbly and has a cheerful personality. She's been working as an electrical engineer for almost 2 years and decided to switch lanes because she was sick of deskbound jobs. She came into this line with no first-hand experience with children but for a rookie, she's not bad. It kinda reminds me of myself when I was a newbie (only I was blurer...duh!)
I got to know her a little bit more and she's super cool. Oh, did I mentioned, she's also very rugged. I did not know that she's a bike-fanatic, talks incessantly about motor gp,motorcross racing and whatever not (Faz, you have to constantly update me ok so I won't get lost!).
I got to know she plays soccer before and rugby, how cool is that!
When she speaks about motorbikes, she kinda reminds me the female version of Faz but of course,my darling always adds in some additional spices to the conversation by adding in sound effects, LOL......
She was shocked that I am quitting but...what to do,life goes on. I wish her the best of luck though...cool people always does,LOL
Anyway, there are so many things happening at the same time, I'm just taking my time and make sure that I paid special attention to each and every one of them but of course, knowing me (the procrastinator), I often caught myself in a whirpool,hai~
Arsenal lost to Man-u. Wenger cited "ladyluck" was not on their side however he's obliged to keep his gunners intact if they find the "right price for one experienced player", hai~
Speaking of soccer, I feel so sorry for the team. Imagine playing with only 7 running men on the field against a full squad. Goodness.....players "buih" , what's new right? Anyway, they've got regular players so I don't know,they have to come up with a strategy or something to keep the team together.
First thing first, knowing your own players well. Trust me, back in my hockey days we had this major problem too. How did we tackle it?We tried so many things but it backfired until we decided to switch to "buddy system." Instead of having the team captain or vice-cap doing mass messages to the team which often creates misery to the former, we created a buddy system. Each regular player is "attached and responsible" for her buddy. However,point to note, the captain/vice-captain must really know their regulars and from there, they pair each regular up with players who often have problems turning up for trainings or games. These regulars will often remind their buddy almost about everything. It sounds pretty sucky right? It's like having someone breathing down your neck and you feel like shoving her away but trust me, it helps.
Not only do you remind one another about trainings,games and stuff, you get to know the person a little better too. In my team's system, all the defenders come together, the midfield and the forwards each have their own buddy within their group. My buddy was Aslin Harminah and she is one super-cool buddy. I'm playing left and she's the stopper so we did learnt from one another.I remembered clearly that she had problems attending training at times due to classes because she was sitting for the A levels. Nevertheless, I tried to keep her on track and it works. She does it to me too and it gets ever "cooler" when we call ourselves "eh buddy...amaciam?" instead of names.
It may sound absurd and childish considering the fact that we are adults but hey, it's worth trying. It works for us!We had a strong team's camaraderie and although we were not champions, we played like champions and that is what matters. We had great rapport and at the end of the day, we were satisfied.Dang..........I miss hockey!
Right side...strong side...left side...strong side....tessyekur adderim (LOL...)
So, I don't know maybe Akim or Rahman could try this method if they want to have regulars in their team.
Back to work...oh bother....
To my brown-eyed cutie, finish your tutorials oteh...miss you!
Suddenly, I feel so-like-Baba!
I normally sleep late but lately, I have been sleeping at 9pm and waking up at 11pm or 12am feeling groggy and agitated. Work's not done, bag's not packed,shucks......
Anyway,I'm counting down, 8 weeks left and I'm looking forward to the day where I'll be able to walk away free without having any guilty conscience and my heads up high, telling myself that,"I have indeed made the right decision."
Anyway, each time I'm moving to something new, there's always a couple of other setbacks that comes along the way. Not many of them turns out ugly, this is just one of the rare occassion that keeps me on my toes and it "pinches" me. (why do I care so much, do they care...no right...so?)
Anyway,as I was saying, there is a newbie at my workplace,she's super cool. She's 27 but she doesn't look 27,very spunky,bubbly and has a cheerful personality. She's been working as an electrical engineer for almost 2 years and decided to switch lanes because she was sick of deskbound jobs. She came into this line with no first-hand experience with children but for a rookie, she's not bad. It kinda reminds me of myself when I was a newbie (only I was blurer...duh!)
I got to know her a little bit more and she's super cool. Oh, did I mentioned, she's also very rugged. I did not know that she's a bike-fanatic, talks incessantly about motor gp,motorcross racing and whatever not (Faz, you have to constantly update me ok so I won't get lost!).
I got to know she plays soccer before and rugby, how cool is that!
When she speaks about motorbikes, she kinda reminds me the female version of Faz but of course,my darling always adds in some additional spices to the conversation by adding in sound effects, LOL......
She was shocked that I am quitting but...what to do,life goes on. I wish her the best of luck though...cool people always does,LOL
Anyway, there are so many things happening at the same time, I'm just taking my time and make sure that I paid special attention to each and every one of them but of course, knowing me (the procrastinator), I often caught myself in a whirpool,hai~
Arsenal lost to Man-u. Wenger cited "ladyluck" was not on their side however he's obliged to keep his gunners intact if they find the "right price for one experienced player", hai~
Speaking of soccer, I feel so sorry for the team. Imagine playing with only 7 running men on the field against a full squad. Goodness.....players "buih" , what's new right? Anyway, they've got regular players so I don't know,they have to come up with a strategy or something to keep the team together.
First thing first, knowing your own players well. Trust me, back in my hockey days we had this major problem too. How did we tackle it?We tried so many things but it backfired until we decided to switch to "buddy system." Instead of having the team captain or vice-cap doing mass messages to the team which often creates misery to the former, we created a buddy system. Each regular player is "attached and responsible" for her buddy. However,point to note, the captain/vice-captain must really know their regulars and from there, they pair each regular up with players who often have problems turning up for trainings or games. These regulars will often remind their buddy almost about everything. It sounds pretty sucky right? It's like having someone breathing down your neck and you feel like shoving her away but trust me, it helps.
Not only do you remind one another about trainings,games and stuff, you get to know the person a little better too. In my team's system, all the defenders come together, the midfield and the forwards each have their own buddy within their group. My buddy was Aslin Harminah and she is one super-cool buddy. I'm playing left and she's the stopper so we did learnt from one another.I remembered clearly that she had problems attending training at times due to classes because she was sitting for the A levels. Nevertheless, I tried to keep her on track and it works. She does it to me too and it gets ever "cooler" when we call ourselves "eh buddy...amaciam?" instead of names.
It may sound absurd and childish considering the fact that we are adults but hey, it's worth trying. It works for us!We had a strong team's camaraderie and although we were not champions, we played like champions and that is what matters. We had great rapport and at the end of the day, we were satisfied.Dang..........I miss hockey!
Right side...strong side...left side...strong side....tessyekur adderim (LOL...)
So, I don't know maybe Akim or Rahman could try this method if they want to have regulars in their team.
Back to work...oh bother....
To my brown-eyed cutie, finish your tutorials oteh...miss you!
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Tummy
This tummy of mine have to go...uuuurrggghhh...bloordy irritating.
Irritating bugger......
I've been jogging (oh...have I?)
As a matter of fact...yes!
I've been very "semangat" ever since the new shoes and sports bra came into my life (lol!)
Faz prefers to run in the afternoon but I prefer to run at night. I don't mean to sound lame but
I told him yesterday, after our run that, perharps my oxygen level deteriorates in the afternoon (crap!)
They said, it is better to jog in the morning or afternoon, you'll burn more calories. I can't deny that fact but I can't....like totally. One more thing, I can only run when I'm really, really stress.Yesterday's run was a big boo-boo....calf muscles were a little tight. Faz said I looked really tired!
Well, I had my run on Wednesday too so I guess, I did not rest well. I've been sleeping rather late these days so major bummer for me. The run on Wednesday wasn't that bad. I was really getting on the momentum. Friday's run was a big boo-boo especially for him because he really wanted to jog till Bukit Gombak but I "pancit" halfway through,sorry..........
We'll try again this Monday and sorry sayang, I really can't jog in the afternoon. I'm a night-person. So, we gladly plan our jogging schedule which is going to be 3 times a week,woah.....but nothing is impossible kan kan kan?
Monday - I'll "ciaoz" at 4.15pm, go home, eat,rest and I'll start my jog straight after maghrib prayers.
Tuesday - Tution at 5pm, hoping to end by 6pm and complete my work.
Wednesday - Tution at 4.30pm, hoping to end by 5.45pm, rush home and meet him after maghrib for our run.
Thursday - Tution at 5.30pm, hoping to end by 7pm.
Friday- TGIF...jogging at ..........?
Saturday- Tution at 9am, hoping to end by 10.30am
Sunday - Tution at 9am, hoping to end by 10 am so I could catch some action while he's at the pitch during halftime (I doubt I could!)
So yes...this is my life.......as told by Ginger (lol!)
P/S: I'm itching to play hockey.....yes...desperately....but how...no time!
I'm so fickle-minded...dang....played soccer for a while and I suddenly realised that maybe I'm not good at it. I'm so used to hockey and I'm very comfortable with it. But to get back to hockey is no easy task, it'll take me say 1 year to get back to basics and my defending skills. All the jabbing, the sweeping, ball clearance...dang....
I miss hockey...period
Irritating bugger......
I've been jogging (oh...have I?)
As a matter of fact...yes!
I've been very "semangat" ever since the new shoes and sports bra came into my life (lol!)
Faz prefers to run in the afternoon but I prefer to run at night. I don't mean to sound lame but
I told him yesterday, after our run that, perharps my oxygen level deteriorates in the afternoon (crap!)
They said, it is better to jog in the morning or afternoon, you'll burn more calories. I can't deny that fact but I can't....like totally. One more thing, I can only run when I'm really, really stress.Yesterday's run was a big boo-boo....calf muscles were a little tight. Faz said I looked really tired!
Well, I had my run on Wednesday too so I guess, I did not rest well. I've been sleeping rather late these days so major bummer for me. The run on Wednesday wasn't that bad. I was really getting on the momentum. Friday's run was a big boo-boo especially for him because he really wanted to jog till Bukit Gombak but I "pancit" halfway through,sorry..........
We'll try again this Monday and sorry sayang, I really can't jog in the afternoon. I'm a night-person. So, we gladly plan our jogging schedule which is going to be 3 times a week,woah.....but nothing is impossible kan kan kan?
Monday - I'll "ciaoz" at 4.15pm, go home, eat,rest and I'll start my jog straight after maghrib prayers.
Tuesday - Tution at 5pm, hoping to end by 6pm and complete my work.
Wednesday - Tution at 4.30pm, hoping to end by 5.45pm, rush home and meet him after maghrib for our run.
Thursday - Tution at 5.30pm, hoping to end by 7pm.
Friday- TGIF...jogging at ..........?
Saturday- Tution at 9am, hoping to end by 10.30am
Sunday - Tution at 9am, hoping to end by 10 am so I could catch some action while he's at the pitch during halftime (I doubt I could!)
So yes...this is my life.......as told by Ginger (lol!)
P/S: I'm itching to play hockey.....yes...desperately....but how...no time!
I'm so fickle-minded...dang....played soccer for a while and I suddenly realised that maybe I'm not good at it. I'm so used to hockey and I'm very comfortable with it. But to get back to hockey is no easy task, it'll take me say 1 year to get back to basics and my defending skills. All the jabbing, the sweeping, ball clearance...dang....
I miss hockey...period
Friday, April 11, 2008
Random
Opportunity cost: yes, life has always been about opportunity cost.
This term gives me goosebumps at times, points of confusion although it is not meant to be that way,technically.
I have 2 months to decide, should I pursue my degree?Should I?We do not forsake education,at any cost.But, in my case,dang...it's hard!
The opportunity cost of me pursuing my degree is actually saving up all the money for further usage. But isn't that contradictory? I can't deny the fact that I am a walking contradiction at times, or should I say most of the time?
I'm trying to save up. I'm trying to upgrade myself further.I'm trying my level best to seize any golden opportunity that comes along my way.
In any case, what I need is a financial planner. I can't believe I'm talking about engaging a financial planner.Geez......
Anyway,I'm taking on a second job as a tutor (5 times a week,phew!)
Besides my tight weekday schedule, I try to squeeze 1-1.5hrs of tution time into my schedule. 3 on weekdays as well as Saturday,Sundays!
Mom thinks I'm insane!
I'm counting down : 8 more weeks to go......
This term gives me goosebumps at times, points of confusion although it is not meant to be that way,technically.
I have 2 months to decide, should I pursue my degree?Should I?We do not forsake education,at any cost.But, in my case,dang...it's hard!
The opportunity cost of me pursuing my degree is actually saving up all the money for further usage. But isn't that contradictory? I can't deny the fact that I am a walking contradiction at times, or should I say most of the time?
I'm trying to save up. I'm trying to upgrade myself further.I'm trying my level best to seize any golden opportunity that comes along my way.
In any case, what I need is a financial planner. I can't believe I'm talking about engaging a financial planner.Geez......
Anyway,I'm taking on a second job as a tutor (5 times a week,phew!)
Besides my tight weekday schedule, I try to squeeze 1-1.5hrs of tution time into my schedule. 3 on weekdays as well as Saturday,Sundays!
Mom thinks I'm insane!
I'm counting down : 8 more weeks to go......
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Conformity
I've always felt that each and everyone of us in this world has a unique innate quality that is waiting to embrace and seize any opportunities that comes along the way. I'm sorry to say this but despite being in a cosmopolitan democratic country, sometimes I feel that conformity is just one piece of crap (sorry!)
No offence though but my judgement and grievances is just a personal random attack.
I've always been a firm believer of living life simplistically with the simplest essence in life. Additional spices to the wonders of life is a bonus and, should we have the means to seize it, why not? However, let me make it clear. No one is born the same, we are all different,unique individuals, trust me! (Howard Gardner, Multiple Intelligence)
I have my strength and weakness,something which others do not possesss.I daresay I am unique in my own way. I am blur in my own way, I am stubborn in my own way, I am crazy in one way or another and this is me, you have to accept my flaws because I am not perfect afterall. Nevertheless, God gives me brains and the innate ability to judge for myself, I am the living,walking, blurest person on earth but that does not make me feel inferior one bit. I do my work, results were produced, credits were given to me when it is due, what more can I ask for?
It's really upsetting when comparison are made between people. Do not be too quick to judge, to me , healthy competition is encouraged but the moment you are being compared and being asked to be like someone which you are not.......that's really sad!
I may be full of smiles (I do have my ups and downs at times!) but deep inside, I feel hurt. It comes to the point where I have to justify to people and make it known to them that this is me, I am what I am whether you like it or not. Yes, I embrace changes, I do not believe in stagnant situation which might eventually leads to further regression in life. I accept changes but it's a matter of time when I have to say,"stop, this is me,you just have to accept it!"
Yes, life examples are good for the soul. But....to what extent?It feels so sad at times and sometimes I feel like running away and never come back.
No offence though but my judgement and grievances is just a personal random attack.
I've always been a firm believer of living life simplistically with the simplest essence in life. Additional spices to the wonders of life is a bonus and, should we have the means to seize it, why not? However, let me make it clear. No one is born the same, we are all different,unique individuals, trust me! (Howard Gardner, Multiple Intelligence)
I have my strength and weakness,something which others do not possesss.I daresay I am unique in my own way. I am blur in my own way, I am stubborn in my own way, I am crazy in one way or another and this is me, you have to accept my flaws because I am not perfect afterall. Nevertheless, God gives me brains and the innate ability to judge for myself, I am the living,walking, blurest person on earth but that does not make me feel inferior one bit. I do my work, results were produced, credits were given to me when it is due, what more can I ask for?
It's really upsetting when comparison are made between people. Do not be too quick to judge, to me , healthy competition is encouraged but the moment you are being compared and being asked to be like someone which you are not.......that's really sad!
I may be full of smiles (I do have my ups and downs at times!) but deep inside, I feel hurt. It comes to the point where I have to justify to people and make it known to them that this is me, I am what I am whether you like it or not. Yes, I embrace changes, I do not believe in stagnant situation which might eventually leads to further regression in life. I accept changes but it's a matter of time when I have to say,"stop, this is me,you just have to accept it!"
Yes, life examples are good for the soul. But....to what extent?It feels so sad at times and sometimes I feel like running away and never come back.
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